Thursday, April 19, 2012

(non)Local Hero, Vol. I

The gut-brain axis is a great VOS*, but a terrible master.

Stewardship of one's nervous system is practically a heroic act.

Ex:



For best results, please CTRL+click on this link to listen to "Going Home: Theme of the Local Hero" by Mark Knopfler while reading along:
http://grooveshark.com/#!/s/Going+Home+Theme+Of+The+Local+Hero/39DNRP?src=5 

May it make you lonesome for your Self.

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Where are you on your "hero's journey"?


Manifesting blue feathers?


Breathing into your heels?




Starting your Eden Project/Going Home project?  (Looking for your Magical Other?)


CTRL+click to listen in a new tab!

"Home" - Edward Sharpe and the The Magnetic Zeros


Awakening?



On par with TM 'experts,' I'll be a (non)local hero and point out thousands of faces of sillyness where I see them...

1.

Silly local raw milkSMEEEAR campaign article:
http://www.kptv.com/story/17417675/e-coli-cases-traced-to-raw-milk-from-clackamas-county-farm

Here's why - "QE2 - A RAW DEAL" - AKA PROJECT DAIRYGATE:
http://www.theglobeandmail.com/news/opinions/raw-milk-fans-are-getting-a-raw-deal/article1722070/ 

Chris Kresser - Raw Milk Reality series
http://chriskresser.com/raw-milk-reality


 "That's it...moo like a little cow for me.  There, dear...let me wipe your nose...yes."

Or if you prefer a more comforting, illustrated version of reality...

South Park - "You Don't Have To Feel Alone Anymore"


"I bet you can squeal!...I bet you can squeal like a pig!"

And for the daring - animated!...  (you can always look away - I did)
http://www.southparkstudios.com/clips/187273/you-dont-have-to-feel-alone-anymore

Am I suggesting that people who drink pasteurized skim milk are getting F'd in the A?  Yes.

And now to get really speculative...

Distilled water - could it really be a "common thread' between practices that have outstanding associated health claims such as urine therapy, raw milk, juicing, and vampirism?  Can it really help to decalcify a stony pineal gland?

Andrew Norton Webber - "Fluoride & Liquid Therapies":
http://www.youtube.com/watch?feature=player_embedded&v=RILh2FYaMPQ

Could his message possibly be true?
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2.

Silly Portlandia propaganda episode:

"Is It Local?"

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=l2LBICPEK6w



What's wrong with this clip?  It is designed to confuse you.  I would suggest that it is even a disinformation play.


- poultry really isn't a healthy food in the first place - even though it has been painted as such in the MSM.  Even when pasture-rasied, poultry (especially turkey) is a bit ω-6 heavy.  Note that most poultry in the world is not pasture-rasied (and thus vastly higher in ω-6), as of June 2012.

(beef, lamb, and bison are vastly healthier)

- heritage breed, woodland-raised chicken (my fellows: insist on eating pasture-raised animals - it's the only unambiguous term)

- fed a diet of sheep's milk, soy, and hazelnuts (total nonsense!)

[SOY is powerfully (phyt)estrogenic - many times more than birth control pills - and is not a safe food for you or your chickens]

- he asks her twice whether or not the chicken is "local" - makes him look like a fag (even though it is ultimately an important question)

- she asks about the size of the space where the chickens run free, is told it is four acres, and seems unsatisfied

- "so weird with that gas pedal - that thing just moves the whole vehicle forward" - makes him look like a fag, further discredits any possible questions he could have

- he asks about the chicken's personal life

- "it tears at the core of my being the idea of someone just cashing in on a trend like 'organic'"

ORGANIC - a trend?


My fellows, hopefully by now you realize that this Portlandia clip was designed to discourage you from asking questions about your food, and to purvey the idea that those who do ask questions are silly/ridiculous/impractical. 


Certainly, even pre-metamorphosis, pipe-weed smoking Gandalf the Grey asked more pertinent questions than this nutritionally defunct pair!




"Is it secret?  Is it safe?"

- good information, that is.  And boy, oh boy, is it ever expensive!  Secret, safe information might well be stored in Swiss banks and polar seed vaults, for all I know!

...segue...

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3.


"Should we have never invented the Internet?" 

Silly concept, intellectual feudalism:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Ct9xzXUQLuY&feature=related

I think the Rockefellers and others near the top introduced the Internet (which apparently started on this planet with DARPA - the ARPANET) - and now they are regretting it because of blogs like this one!

(see "Are you AOL or AWOL?")

4.

ALZHEIMER'S REMEDY

Silly coconut oil cover story:  (don't be fooled - it's not radical enough!)
http://www.cbn.com/media/player/index.aspx?s=/mp4/LJO190v1_WS

I do recommend you eat coconut oil.  I don't recommend you put it on oatmeal.

Cannabutter (or cannabis-infused ghee, or cannabis-infused coconut oil) makes an even better Alzheimer's remedy/preventive/preventative.  Just ask Dr. Weil - he knows the truth.

He also knows that self-talk during LSD trips can be a great way of ridding yourself of pesky cat allergies or fair skin!  Just look at that nice tan!



[if you don't believe me, see Andrew Weil's video on my post, "MariNoia, Vol. III:  Phoenix Tears".]

5.

MIGRAINE MADNESS! - "COSMIC LOBOTOMY"



Look!  Dr. Day has a wife and a baby and he's the only doc in Oregon performing this "relatively new procedure"!  Are you convinced?  Aren't you ready to go under the knife yet?  What's taking you so long?!  Make up your mind! He's the obvious choice!




Brow surgery for migraines or brow chakra surgery to spiritually cripple budding shamans?

This seems the ultimate Problem-Reaction-Soultion, folks. Here is a video promoting Dr. Day's migraine procedure:

http://www.videocounty.com/videos/plastic-surgery-for-migraine-headaches/

Within this video is every detail pertinent to my specific situation

- "relatively new procedure"
- "Corvallis doctor" - only one in Oregon performing this procedure (limited choice)
- requires the diagnosis of a neurologist, which I have at the ready
- less than a mile away!
- possibly cost-effective in the long term

Is it too good to be true?  I think so.  I'm a shaman, and a conspiracy theorist.  Live free or die!  I will never take the subdermal RFID microchip, and I will remain wary of brow chakra surgery. 

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*VOS - vehicle of the Spirit

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